You know who You are!
There are so many things that have happened in the last few weeks that I have been remiss in recording here. But I promised to get this up today by a deadline, so we have what we have today. Some things from my growing list I need to post about:
Bondi getting fired at the beginning of the month. A partial move by the government to keep her from testifying about the Epstein cover up. The DOJ says her subpoena is void, but lawmakers maintain that the subpoena was issued to her personally and that she remains obligated to testify. 70 attorneys filed an ethics complaint against her in 2025 that the Florida bar dismissed, of course. But, because she is no longer in office, Lawyers Defending American Democracy (LDAD) have announced plans to refile or strengthen complaints, arguing the previous exemption no longer applies.
Also, Kristi Noem got fired at the beginning of March, a scapegoat for the Dept. of Homeland Security, and the ridiculousness of her $220 million video production. Then tRump gave her a new role called “Envoy for The Shield of the Americas.” WTF? Notice that says AmericaS, not North America…. Gotta LOL that her husband was *BUSTED* (<-pun!) for his bimbofication fetish. A new word for many of us, I’m sure.
Thank you for reading today's post. Have an InterStellar Day! ~PrP
Return those trees. They will grow to at least 500 feet. Hence, they will be discovered to be non Earth in origin. On Earth The maximum height a tree can reach (before the energy required to push water against gravity outweighs the energy the tree can expend) is 426 feet (130 meters). Currently, the tallest known living tree in the world is a 380-foot Coastal Redwood tree.
You may need the bark from those trees to feed on Earth, but your presence on Earth doesn’t supersede the requirement to not introduce foreign vegetation to a planet where the vegetation will eventually dwarf the indigenous species.
All have been seized and returned.
The Secretary of the Navy refused to order the capture of the Ear among other things and the Ear was allowed to use US Navy hardware and personnel to land in Iran. So he was fired. Last we heard was him telling tRump to kiss his ass as he left his office. Hegseth was also given the finger and told where he could stick his order to have the Navy Seals to go after the Ear. I doubt the Seals would fuck with him anyway, They’d just abort the mission as they have done in the past, but Baithwaite, wouldn’t give the order.
Trump has every reason to go after that murderer. He killed or caused to be killed more than a thousand Muslims on his last visit to Iran. The guy has so much blood on his hands, it’s a wonder he can sleep without feeling the weight of all that death haunting him. The only reason that guy quit is because he was afraid to defy the Ear. That’s treason. Why the US military allows that blood thirsty maniac to use their technology to carry out his despicable crimes is the crime of the century.
No one like the guy. Yes, they fear him, but most would like to see him dead.
The truth will eventually come out that trump wasn’t allowed in the operation room while the US military was attempting to rescue those two lost airmen. He was briefed during and after they were rescued. That was the Ear’s requirement if he was going to lead a rescue mission. Yes, he entered Iran at his own peril to make that happen. Shit people died. Iran wasn’t going to just hand those Americans over.
There was death all along the way. From the moment they crossed into Iran they were met with lethal resistance. No quarter was asked and none was given. The ear didn’t shrink from the risk. To see the almost frail man not hesitate to wade into hand to hand battle when it called for it was so energizing to his men that they would have followed him into hell to fight Satan himself.
You think all that bravery was lost on the hearts and minds of the US military at the highest level, think again. Those Generals and Admirals aren’t afraid of the Ear, they admire his courage and commitment in the face of superior odds. He brings a kind of Strategy and Tactics to see that the strategy is successful to the battlefield seldom seen in the modern world.
That has no bearing on John Phelan who is just another trump millionaire who lost face because he was more afraid of the Ear than trump.
Trump, his family and close billionaire friends are pocketing about 21% of the military budget. Now they plan to up that % on the additional $441 billion they are asking Congress for. They plan to extend the war as long as they can to capture as much profits as they can get from the military budget, manipulating the stock market and strong-arming businesses and countries for money. They are using the federal treasury as their personal slush fund.
None of that takes in account of the money tRump is demanding from people he threatens to sic his DOJ on if they don’t pony up, or the scheme to sue the departments of government he has appointed heads to so they can “settle” his law suits for hundreds of millions or billions of dollars. The SCOTUS has given him a license to steal and he is robbing the country blind.
I cannot understand these polls on tRump when it comes to “Independents.” Who are these liars claiming they are independents? Most are maga bastards who are lying the usual way those sons of bitches lie. But how come it’s 47% disapproval of tRump? You telling me that 57% of those liars believe that the piece of shit is handling the economy ok?
bimbofication Is just another way for the whiteboy to make his sick shit okay. Using that made up word they get to dis women while making men look not so bad. My cousin has been dressing like that for over a decade. He is just a gay man with dress judgements.
The whiteboy in america is so narcissistic that any negative behavior by his race has to be made into something special. Someone needs to tell them a gay is a gay. How he chooses to dress is not definitive.
I and my cousin are white.
Keep in mind the three C’s – Cost, Chaos, and Corruption. That is the way tRump rules. They are making money off predicting what the government will do. Betting on the markets using inside information is enriching the tRump regime massively. Billionaires are being made every day.
The UAE has bought and paid for the tRump family. Most of the Emirates are competing against each other to see who can own the most of the tRump regime. This all happens because the DOJ is an extension of the WH. We exist with a malfunctioning criminal justice system. But the Pentagon is now so corrupt it is competing with the DOJ for who can be the most corrupt. Everything and everyone in the tRump regime is for sale.
Did You Know
The average snowfall in New York City (25.8″) is almost four times higher than Antarctica (which sees a scant total of 6.5″ per year).
Did You Know
When it comes to spice production, nobody can hold a candle to India. Around 75 percent of all the spices in the world are produced there and they out produce the next contender, Bangladesh, by tenfold.
Sometimes Earth diamonds work better for our needs than space diamonds. They can be used to replace those crystals from Lhopt that ocassionally fail during high maneuvering events at scale. Using Earth diamonds on a nanoscale enables them to bend in the exact proportions necessary to enact those maneuvers perfectly. This gives us MotherShips the flexibility to enter warp drive almost instantly.
The fact that now many Earth diamonds are needed to accomplish this function is incredible. Dilithium crystals work fine for warp drive, but the fact that nanodiamonds bend, but do not break under the same pressure in which dilithium crystals will is as the humans say “a game changer.”
Nanodaimonds give MotherShips faster speeds, faster warp drive attainability, and much more maneuverability while doing it. Humans see diamonds as being hard and brittle, keep it that way.
That should read that NOT many Earth diamonds are need to accomplish our needs. Actually only 4 one carat stones of the worst quality will power a MotherShip to warp drive in one second of Earth time. And that power can be repeated for almost a century of Earth time.
Someone asked about the price of gold during the tRump administration. They should also be concerned about these products because their cost will also go up.
1. Gas – About 20 percent of the global oil supply moves through the Strait of Hormuz.
2. Health Insurance – The overall cost of health care in America is expected to rise by 6 to 7 percent in 2026.
3. Utilities – You’ll be shelling out more for your electric bill in 2026. Residential energy prices are already 9.5 percent higher this year than in 2025, according to the U.S. Energy Information Administration (EIA). Growing demand for electricity from new data centers is contributing to higher prices in some areas of the country, including Texas and several mid-Atlantic states.
4. Groceries – The Economic Research Service of the U.S. Department of Agriculture predicts grocery prices will rise 3.1 percent in 2026.
5. Auto and home insurance – Parts of California and disaster-prone Gulf Coast states could see home insurance premiums rise by more than 20 percent, according to California-based insurance agency Inszone Insurance Services. California, Nevada, New Jersey, New York and Washington, D.C., will see the biggest jumps in auto insurance rates this year, according to ValuePenguin’s State of Auto Insurance in 2026 report.
6. Clothes and footwear – Tariffs hit the apparel industry particularly hard in 2025, because almost all clothing sold in America is imported.
7. Smartphones and computers – A March 2025 report from market research firm Counterpoint Research predicts that smartphone prices will rise in 2026 as a result of chip shortages. Prices for lower-cost smartphones are expected to increase by about $30, and premium phones will likely see hikes of $150 to $200.
Computers will also be more expensive as a result of the chip shortage. According to a December 2025 study from market intelligence firm International Data Corporation, computer manufacturers Acer, Asus, Dell, HP and Lenovo are raising computer prices by 15 to 20 percent in 2026.
8. Jewelry – Gold, silver and platinum prices hit all-time highs in January 2026. Prices have since been volatile in response to the war in Iran but should continue to rise throughout the year.
9. Shipping – Sending care packages to your kids or grandkids will cost more in 2026 — the U.S. Postal Service (USPS) on Jan. 18 announced price increases for its shipping services. On March 25, it announced an additional 8 percent increase to offset rising transportation costs that will be in effect April 26 through Jan. 17, 2027.
In addition, the Postal Service said in a September 2025 statement that it plans to raise the price of the Forever stamp, which is currently 78 cents and covers the cost to mail a 1-ounce letter, in mid-2026, though it didn’t specify the size of the increase.
Note to humans: We have nothing to do with your missing or dead scientists. We don’t need primitive brains.
Thank you for your input. Something nefarious it’s going on and.l i’m gonna follow up
The predatory politicians abound in DC. Swalwell was being blackmailed by China. They had multiple tapes of him and several Chinese spies, some very young. Congress is full to the brim of clients that are being blackmailed by Putin or Xi.
Hackers linked to the government of Iran have been targeting U.S. energy and water infrastructure since President Donald Trump launched a war in Iran, according to a new advisory from the Cybersecurity and Infrastructure Security Agency (CISA) and several other federal agencies.
The hackers have targeted programmable logic controllers (PLCs) made by Rockwell Automation, which allow for digital control of physical systems like water treatment and electricity generation, according to CISA. The agency is “urgently warning” American companies about the risk of exploitation for internet-connected tech.
The hacking has created “disruptions across several U.S. critical infrastructure sectors.
Let me give you a 3rd acronym – QUESADILLA for tRump”s behavior.
Questionably Upends Every Stable Arrangement, Declares It Leadership, Loses Attention.
How about PRaT – Pedophile, Rapist, and Traitor.
“I once thought becoming a woman meant finding a man worthy of the measure. But it meant learning I was the ruler all along. And the first thing I had to measure was the cost of my own choices.”
Now that you know. What will you do with the knowledge?
From: Salty Politics from Julie Roginsky
Date: April 26, 2026 at 6:40:11 AM PDT
To:orderlyrandomness.com
Subject: The Media’s Gross Performance after the WHCD Shooting
Reply-To: Salty Politics from Julie Roginsky
The Media’s Gross Performance after the WHCD Shooting
The old media order dressed up for a banquet and discovered that its own credibility was on the menu.
JULIE ROGINSKY APR 26
Last night, legacy media held its own funeral and called it the White House Correspondents’ Dinner. The final nail in the coffin was what happened in the White House briefing room after a shooter tried to cross the security perimeter at the Washington Hilton to enter the ballroom where this event was taking place.
Donald Trump, who has spent years treating the First Amendment as an obstacle to overcome, was welcomed into the ballroom as if this were all normal. The assembled journalists, decked out in their black tie finest, greeted his presence as if he had not called them the enemy of the people, as if he had not threatened their networks, bullied them, sued their news organizations, and built an entire political movement around delegitimizing any fact he finds inconvenient.
They showed up to preen and party anyway.
They put on gowns and tuxedos, smiled for cameras, and clinked glasses. They feted the president who has made attacking them central to his political identity. The whole grotesque spectacle was supposed to be a celebration of press freedom. Instead, it became a case study in institutional self-abasement.
Then came the shooting.
The president, First Lady, and members of the cabinet were rushed out of the dinner, a Secret Service agent was struck in the vest by a bullet, and the suspect was arrested. Trump later appeared in the White House briefing room for a late-night press conference, flanked by officials, while reporters —many still in formalwear — asked questions after an event that had just exposed the absurd intimacy between power and the people assigned to scrutinize it.
This should have been a clarifying moment. But the shooting did not erase the context of the night — it sharpened it. The absurdity of what happened next underscored that our legacy media is seriously broken. In fact, it is dead — and the performance of journalists in the White House briefing room after the shooting was the final nail in the coffin.
Both last night and this morning, these journalists congratulated each other all over social media for rushing to the White House to cover their own assassination attempts. They should hang their heads in shame instead, based on what happened inside the briefing room…
Louisiana eliminating this clerk’s office is an attack on Black political power
https://www.ms.now/opinion/louisiana-court-clerk-calvin-duncan-bill-new-orleans?cid=eml_mda_20260426&user_email=9f0a3b1720d5d822cbdff9d44652ac1806bfc33eca8d02d55f171adfc86bb053
Anti-democratic: In November, more than two-thirds of New Orleans voters chose Calvin Duncan, a jailhouse lawyer who was imprisoned for 28 years for a murder he did not commit, as clerk of the criminal district court. But the Louisiana legislature is now racing to pass a bill that would eliminate the office, in a move clearly aimed at reducing Black political strength, Jarvis DeBerry argues. The bill would eliminate his office, which maintains the records in a busy criminal court, handing over those duties to the civil court clerk. Knowing the future of his office was in doubt, Duncan defiantly took the oath of office Tuesday ahead of his May 4 start. Read more.
4
Turning point: Tennessee state lawmakers advanced a bill they are calling the “Charlie Kirk Act,” named after the Turning Point USA co-founder who was assassinated while speaking on a Utah campus in September. The bill mandates suspensions for coordinated walkouts by students and banners displayed in protest to a campus speaker. The law “does nothing to promote dialogue,” Tennessee state Rep. Justin Jones argues, and instead “weaponizes state authority” to silence people with an alternative point of view. The bill is especially ironic given professors in the state were expelled or suspended for not mourning Kirk after his death, Jones argues. Read more.
Your favorite fast food restaurant is probably dirtier than your kitchen on its worst day. That sounds extreme, I know. But when you look at what health inspectors have actually documented — cockroaches, rat droppings, maggots inside soda machines — it starts to feel less like an exaggeration and more like an uncomfortable fact. The biggest chains in America, the ones you trust because they’re everywhere, are some of the worst offenders.
How did Chipotle end up with criminal charges?
Chipotle serves over 750,000 customers every single day. Between 2015 and 2018, the chain made more than 1,100 of those people sick through a series of foodborne illness outbreaks across multiple states. Five separate norovirus incidents. The company was hit with criminal charges — actual criminal charges — for adulterating food in violation of federal law. They eventually paid $25 million to settle, making it the largest food safety case in U.S. history.
The root cause? Employees weren’t following basic food safety protocols. Some workers have described conditions behind the counter that included overflowing trash and rats in the kitchen. And these weren’t ancient problems either. Additional civil actions were filed against Chipotle as recently as 2023 for workplace safety and health violations in various states. For a chain that charges a premium for its food, you’d expect better.
Burger King’s Massachusetts nightmare
Massachusetts seems to be Burger King’s problem state, though that might just be because their inspectors are thorough. In 2024, one location got cited for nine core health code violations in a single visit. Dirty ice machines, produce stored at wrong temperatures, missing thermometers in the walk-in cooler. These aren’t nitpicky complaints. Every one of those issues can directly lead to someone getting food poisoning.
Two years earlier, another Massachusetts location was described by inspectors as simply “very unclean.” That’s inspector-speak, which means it was probably way worse than it sounds. A different store saw its own workers walk out over conditions they found unacceptable. When inspectors followed up, they found floors caked with grime under equipment and near drains. And then there’s the Florida location in 2023 where live maggots were found crawling inside a soda machine — alongside 27 other violations. Twenty-eight problems. One restaurant.
Does Taco Bell have a permanent rat problem?
Taco Bell’s track record goes back decades, and it’s not pretty. An E. coli outbreak in 2006 sickened 71 people along the East Coast, hospitalizing 53 of them. A salmonella outbreak in 2010 hit 155 people across 21 states. Before all of that, a Hepatitis A outbreak in 2000 put 15 people in the hospital. The pattern is hard to ignore.
More recently, multiple locations were shut down in 2021 after inspectors found over 20 violations per restaurant, with rat droppings discovered in food storage areas. A customer’s viral video showed a kitchen littered with garbage and old boxes near food prep stations. Some commenters defended it — “that’s just what rush hour looks like” — but even during the busiest lunch rush, trash piled up next to where your chalupa gets assembled isn’t something anyone should accept as normal.
McDonald’s lost someone over Quarter Pounders
McDonald’s is the most recognizable fast food brand on earth, serving millions daily. That scale doesn’t protect them. Last year, a nationwide E. coli outbreak linked to Quarter Pounders sickened 75 people and killed one. One death. The company got hit with a class action lawsuit and multiple personal injury cases.
Between 2018 and 2019, Boston’s inspectional services department found nearly 125 violations across just seven McDonald’s locations. The list read like a horror movie: improper food storage, mold growing in various spots, rat droppings, and live cockroaches in the kitchen. There have also been ongoing complaints about undercooked meat and cross-contamination leading to food poisoning. When you’re grabbing a McChicken at 11 p.m., roaches are probably the last thing on your mind. Maybe they shouldn’t be.
A child’s permanent brain damage from Wendy’s food
This one is genuinely hard to read. A Michigan family is suing Wendy’s after their child allegedly developed hemolytic uremic syndrome from eating at one of their locations. The infection led to permanent brain damage, kidney failure, and a seizure disorder. When inspectors investigated that restaurant, they found 17 health code violations, including moldy food, spoiled produce, dirty surfaces, and water leaks throughout the building.
Other Wendy’s locations have had their own issues. A Las Vegas restaurant earned 27 demerits in a 2019 inspection for dirty soda nozzles, raw food left on the floor, and cross-contamination between raw and cooked items. A Fort Lauderdale location was featured on a local “Dirty Dining” news segment after inspectors found insects all over the restaurant. How does a place get that bad without someone in management stepping in?
Why do billion-dollar companies let this happen?
It’s a fair question. These are companies with massive budgets and entire departments dedicated to food safety standards. The answer mostly comes down to individual store management and the franchise model. Corporate headquarters can write all the protocols they want. If the overnight manager doesn’t enforce handwashing or the franchise owner skips pest control to save a few hundred bucks a month, the whole system breaks down.
Staffing plays a huge role too. Understaffed restaurants mean workers are rushing through service without time to properly clean. Health inspections only happen periodically — there’s a lot of time between visits for problems to develop, get worse, and become normalized. Some locations have been cited multiple times over several years, which tells you they’re not fixing the root issues even after getting caught. The fines just aren’t painful enough to change behavior.
The menu items aren’t doing you any favors either
Cleanliness aside, the food itself is a whole separate concern. Research into nutritional profiles across 24 chains found that Five Guys has the unhealthiest cheeseburger, with 73% more saturated fat than any competitor. Their fries are the least healthy too, adding 953 calories to your meal. Fatburger’s Vanilla Shake clocks in at 890 calories with 86 grams of sugar — blowing past the recommended daily limit of 50 grams in a single cup.
Sodium is another major offender, especially in chicken sandwiches. Fatburger’s Crispy Chicken Sandwich alone contains more than the FDA’s recommended daily maximum of 2,300 mg. McDonald’s actually came out as the least unhealthy chain overall — but only if you pick carefully. Their McChicken scored roughly half the unhealthiness points of equivalents at Burger King and KFC. Still not health food. Just the lesser evil.
You can actually look up your local restaurant’s inspection history
Most people don’t know this, but inspection reports are public. Almost every state and city posts them online through their health department websites. You search by restaurant name or address, and you can see exactly what was found and when the last inspection happened. Some restaurants are required to post their grade right by the front door.
When you’re reading these reports, look for “critical” violations. Those are the ones that can directly make you sick — wrong food temperatures, cross-contamination, pest infestations. Minor violations like a cracked wall tile or a burned-out light bulb are less concerning. If you see the same critical violations popping up across multiple inspections, that restaurant has a systemic problem. Walk away.
Not every location is a disaster
I should be clear about something. Just because Taco Bell or McDonald’s appears on this list doesn’t mean the one near your house is gross. Most of these violations are tied to specific locations with bad management or undertrained staff. You might have a perfectly clean Wendy’s in your neighborhood even though one three towns over got shut down for moldy food and insects.
The problem is you can’t tell by looking at the dining area. A sparkling front counter doesn’t guarantee a clean kitchen. Some franchise owners genuinely care and run tight operations with well-trained teams. Those locations almost never end up in news stories or inspection reports because they’re doing everything right. The chains on this list earned their spots through patterns — repeated problems at multiple locations over years. When the same company keeps showing up in outbreak investigations, it points to something bigger than one bad manager.
What do inspectors actually check?
Health inspectors don’t just glance around the dining room. They check food storage temperatures, watch how employees wash their hands, look inside refrigerators and freezers, examine prep surfaces, verify expiration dates, and observe how workers handle raw meat versus ready-to-eat food. They’re also looking for evidence of pests — droppings, gnaw marks, live insects.
Violations get classified by severity. Critical ones need immediate correction. Less severe issues might get a timeline for fixing. The restaurant could face fines, mandatory follow-up inspections, or even temporary closure if things are bad enough. But here’s the catch: inspections are periodic, not constant. A restaurant could pass with flying colors one month and have a roach problem develop three weeks later. The system relies on restaurants maintaining standards between visits. And as we’ve seen, that doesn’t always happen.
Half of us want healthier food but can’t afford it
About half of Americans say they’re trying to eat healthier, but 46% report that food prices make it difficult. Fast food is cheap and convenient. That’s the whole appeal. But making even slightly better choices within that system — picking the McDonald’s McChicken over a Popeyes chicken sandwich, grabbing In-N-Out fries instead of Five Guys — can meaningfully reduce your intake of saturated fat and sodium without costing more.
McDonald’s, oddly enough, has cut healthy menu options since the pandemic. Their U.S. president told the Wall Street Journal that consumers aren’t coming in for plant-based proteins. So the industry isn’t going to fix this for you. It comes down to knowing what you’re ordering and where you’re ordering it from — both in terms of nutrition and in terms of whether the kitchen passed its last inspection.
So yeah, your favorite chain might be dirtier than your kitchen
I told you at the top that it sounded extreme. Maggots in soda machines, cockroaches behind fryers, rat droppings in food storage — these aren’t rumors or exaggerations. They’re documented findings from health inspectors doing their jobs. None of this means you have to swear off fast food forever. But maybe pull up the inspection history on your phone before you pull into the drive-thru next time. It takes thirty seconds. And it might save you a very bad week.
Which Egg Brands Are Worth Your Money and Which Ones Belong in the Trash
Have you ever stood in the egg aisle, staring at a wall of cartons, and genuinely wondered if any of it actually matters? Cage-free, free-range, pasture-raised, organic, Grade A — it reads like a vocabulary test nobody studied for. And honestly, most of us just grab whatever’s cheapest or whatever isn’t sold out. But some of these brands have real problems behind the label. Others are doing things right. The difference between the best and worst is bigger than you’d think.
The Store Brands Problem
Let’s start with the eggs most people actually buy: the generic store brands. Kirkland Signature, Great Value, Trader Joe’s, 365 by Whole Foods — they’re everywhere, and they’re usually cheaper. But cheaper comes with a catch, and it’s not just about taste. The biggest issue across almost all of these private-label brands is transparency. Or, more accurately, the total lack of it.
The Cornucopia Institute, which acts as an organic watchdog and maintains an egg scorecard for consumers, couldn’t even properly rank several store brands because there just wasn’t enough information available. Great Value got the lowest possible score — one egg out of five, with zero total points. Kirkland Signature managed two eggs, but the site noted the score wasn’t super reliable because of how little the company shares about its sourcing and practices. Trader Joe’s? Same story. One egg, lowest tier.
And taste-wise, the reviews are rough. Great Value eggs on Walmart’s own website are flooded with complaints. One reviewer described the yolks as “watery” and the whites as “very strange after cooking,” concluding the eggs were only fit for feeding to animals. That’s… not a ringing endorsement. Kirkland Signature fares slightly better — people on Reddit tend to call them “fine,” which is basically the participation trophy of food reviews. You also need a Costco membership to buy them, so there’s that added cost sitting in the background.
Eggland’s Complicated Best
Eggland’s Best is one of those brands that sounds like it should be great. The name literally has “best” in it. And on paper, the nutritional profile is genuinely impressive — seven times the vitamin E of generic eggs, nearly three times more omega-3 fatty acids, and 25% less saturated fat, according to a study published in Poultry Science. The company also boasts some of the strictest quality control standards in the industry.
So what’s the problem? A few things. Reddit users consistently complain about the taste. One person said they couldn’t even finish a carton. Another called the eggs “freaky,” which is a word I never expected to see applied to eggs but here we are. The lower fat content might explain the flavor issue — fat is what makes food taste good, and stripping it out tends to have consequences. But the bigger concern is what’s behind the brand. Eggland’s Best eggs are partly produced by Hillandale Farms, and that name carries some serious baggage.
Hillandale was the subject of a 2015 Humane Society exposé that revealed chickens crammed into filthy cages alongside dead, rotting birds. The company was also connected to massive salmonella recalls in 2010, and its then-head, Jack DeCoster, admitted to multiple counts of animal cruelty that same year. Oh, and in 2020, New York state sued Hillandale for price gouging during the pandemic. They settled by donating 1.2 million eggs to food banks. So when you pick up a carton of Eggland’s Best, you might be supporting a supply chain with a genuinely ugly history. That nutritional boost starts to feel less exciting in context.
Another Brand to Skip
Speaking of supply chains with issues, Lathem Family Farms is another name worth knowing — mostly so you can avoid it. Their eggs show up at Trader Joe’s, Royal, and Harveys, which means you might be grabbing them without even realizing it. Back in 2016, the company’s owner publicly protested cage-free initiatives, calling the humane standards “chaotic and impossible” even though farms were given over a decade to comply.
Then came the FDA. A 2023 inspection revealed that Lathem Family Farms had a resident strain of Salmonella Enteritidis in its poultry houses and processing facility. No procedures were in place to control salmonella outbreaks. Inspectors found stray cats and foxes living among the chickens. The cages hadn’t been properly cleaned, and there was manure buildup. Flies and rodents were found in the chicken feed. These are the kinds of details that make you want to triple-check every carton label going forward.
And here’s the thing about those FDA warning letters: they don’t come out of nowhere. Companies are given time to fix problems before a formal citation is issued. So what you’re reading in that letter represents conditions the company already had a chance to address and didn’t. Marketside Eggs, another Walmart exclusive, shares a similar problem — there’s essentially no transparency. The brand doesn’t even have its own website. Customers report flimsy packaging, broken eggs, and some of the lowest ratings of any egg brand online. When you can’t find basic information about where your food comes from, that’s usually not a good sign.
The Ones Worth Buying
Alright, enough doom. Let’s talk about who’s actually doing a decent job. Vital Farms is probably the most accessible “good” egg brand in the country. You can find them at most major grocery stores and on Amazon, where they sit at 4.8 out of 5 stars with nearly 14,200 ratings. The company sells pasture-raised and organic pasture-raised eggs, and each hen gets 108 square feet of roaming space. They’re also a certified B Corporation, meaning they’ve proven a commitment to using profits for social and environmental good.
One thing I particularly like: Vital Farms lets you track your eggs from the carton back to the specific farm where they were laid. You can actually look at the farm. That level of transparency is basically the opposite of what we see from Great Value or Marketside. The company also focuses on what it calls “restorative” eggs — laid on farms that practice regenerative agriculture with rotating cover crops. Even the packaging is made partly from those crop fibers. A reviewer on Amazon pushed back on people who complained about varying egg sizes, writing: “c’mon people… do you think the farmer gets to fire chickens that don’t make perfect eggs?” Fair point.
Pete & Gerry’s is another strong pick. They source from over 200 family farms across the U.S., all certified humane and USDA Organic. They’ve been a B Corporation since 2013, and their non-GMO feed policy is a nice touch. The only real knock on them is the plastic packaging — some customers have reported broken eggs in transit. But overall, the brand’s reputation for transparency and animal welfare is solid, and the eggs taste great according to most reviews.
Small Farms, Big Difference
If you really want to feel good about your eggs, the smaller operations are where it’s at. Eight Mile Creek Farm in New York scores an almost perfect 1,795 out of 1,800 on the Cornucopia Institute’s scorecard. That’s essentially a flawless record. Their chickens live in small flocks with indoor and outdoor access, no beak trimming, and — this part got me — fewer than 2% of the flock dies prematurely. The hens live out their full natural lives. It’s a family farm that also produces organic vegetables, pork, chicken, and beef. You’d buy through a CSA share subscription, so it’s not the same as grabbing a carton at Target.
Happy Hens, based in California, operates on a similarly small scale, selling in stores across Orange County and San Diego. The flocks live in mobile coops that get moved every few days so the birds always have fresh pasture. They’re protected by dogs and a donkey, which is genuinely charming. Yelp reviewers are borderline obsessed: “Once you have Happy Hens, you never go back.” That’s a level of loyalty most national brands would kill for.
Then there’s Farmers Hen House, which sources from over 100 mostly Amish and Mennonite family farms within a 6-mile radius. On Target’s website, 92% of reviews are five stars. Customers love the taste, the freshness, and the biodegradable packaging. The brand’s approach — keeping small-scale farming sustainable by contracting with dozens of local families — feels like what the egg industry should look like everywhere. OrgaNick Pastures out of Wisconsin is another standout, available at Sprouts with a 4.5-star rating and solid Cornucopia scores.
What Actually Matters
The biggest takeaway from all of this? Transparency is the single most reliable indicator of egg quality. Brands that share detailed information about their farms, their hens’ living conditions, and their sourcing practices tend to also be the ones producing better-tasting eggs with fewer safety scandals. The brands that hide behind vague labels and private-label anonymity are usually hiding something else too.
That doesn’t mean you need to spend $9 on a dozen eggs every week. Sauder’s, for example, is widely available at stores like Sam’s Club with a 4.7-star rating. They barcode each egg so you can trace it back to the farm on their website. They’ve been around since the 1930s. Are they as pristine as Eight Mile Creek Farm? No. But as a trade-off for accessibility and price, they’re a legitimately good choice. Organic Valley is another solid middle-ground option — all organic, good reviews on Amazon, and usually easier to find than the boutique brands.
So next time you’re staring at that wall of cartons, you don’t need to memorize a spreadsheet. Just remember the short version: if a brand won’t tell you where its eggs come from or how its chickens live, that silence is the answer. And if a brand hands you a farm address, a barcode tracker, and a B Corp certification? That’s the carton worth grabbing.
Great article, Erica. Thanks so much for posting. I mostly shop at a local health food store that has a very good reputation and researches the products they carry. If a product’s quality or falls below their high standard, they’ll drop the product and find a better replacement. I’ve bought Happy Hens eggs recently, a new product I hadn’t see before. However you didn’t mention a few that I have tried and will now do my own research with the tips that were suggested.