Thank you for reading today's post. Have an InterStellar Day! ~PrP
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Latest Posts
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- learning about burning 04/24/2024
- Arizona and Florida and SNOOK! 04/14/2024
- more grifting 04/06/2024
- sunny! 03/29/2024
- absolute criminal 03/21/2024
- don’t #notvote 03/15/2024
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I’m an HSP. Life can be a struggle. Today is my birthday. I recall being 4 years old 54 years ago. There was a large gathering of kids from the Air Force base around the kitchen table. They put a cake in front of me and everyone starting singing happy birthday. I started crying (now I can identify I was overwhelmed).What was supposed to be a happy celebratory moment was very stressful. I put my head down because I was crying. And my long hair caught on fire and went up in flames. I had to go around the base with a pixie hair cut and all the kids pointing fingers at me saying “that’s the girl whose hair caught on fire at her birthday party.”. I was traumatized and I shut down emotionally for many years. I internalized everything until I couldn’t anymore and tried to take my own life. It took work to learn to open up and put words to my feelings.
I can’t say my life has gotten any better. I have seen many therapists but I have never been able to release the dark spot on my soul that makes me feel rotten inside like I’m not worthy. It’s probably why I avoid people and relationships. I have been in depressive pain my whole life.
It took me a long to be able to find the words to express my emotions. Sometimes I do swing the other way and have an emotional outburst. It’s hard for me to manage emotions.
At same time I don’t think I would want to be in a relationship with a non emotional being. Dealing with my emotions is a lifelesson I need to learn and someone that can’t engage emotionally would not be teaching me examples of the life skills I need. And the would always be putting me down for being emotional.
Let me wish you a happy birthday without the head on fire. Your life has meaning maybe not here, but most certainly, it has meaning.
As for the relationship with a non emotional being, maybe that is just what you need. Who but a non emotional being is capable of recognizing your emotional swings without becoming part of the inertia that perpetuates that state of mind.
The “lifelesson” you may need to learn is that you don’t need anyone to teach you anything about how to live on this planet. You have done quite well all by yourself. You have not hurt anyone intentionally, you have been kind to the planet’s animals and flora. Your wants and needs are normal because they do not ask anyone to make a major sacrifice for you to have them. You may not have accomplished having all your dreams come true, but if you examine your accomplishments with the disadvantages you started out with, you will have to admit you have excelled. You can take care of yourself and be of service to others.
Life may not be all you want it to be, but you can be certain that the fact that you were born into this world this day has benefited it much more than most. We look forward to your return to the fold.
Thank you for taking the time to write nice words and wish me happy birthday.
I differ with your opinion however. I do have some experience with non emotional beings. They just negate my feelings and tell me I am over reacting. That is not helpful. It makes me feel small and unseen. There is no support there fore me.
Joke:
Fred and Mary got married, but can’t afford a honeymoon, so they go back to Fred’s parent’s home for their first night together.
In the morning, Johnny, Fred’s little brother, gets up and has his breakfast.
As he is going out of the door to go to school, he asks his Mom if Fred and Mary are up yet.
She replies, “No”.
Johnny asks, “Do you know what I think?”
His mom replies, “I don’t want to hear what you think! Just go to school.”
Johnny comes home for lunch and asks his mom, “Are Fred and Mary up yet?”
She replies, “No.”
Johnny says, “Do you know what I think?”
His mom replies, “Never mind what you think!
Eat your lunch and go back to school.”
After school, Johnny comes home and asks again, “Are Fred and Mary up yet?”
His mom says “No.”
He asks, “Do you know what I think?”
His Mom replies, “Ok, do tell me what you think?”
He says: “Last night Fred came to my room for the Vaseline and I think I gave him my airplane glue.”
Did You Know?
The formal name for the mathematical symbol for infinity, which looks like a sideways figure eight, ∞, is “lemniscate”.
Three separate branches of law enforcement have conveniently erased their 1/6 emails and texts. Sedition is worse for a country than regular treason. It is when the citizens want to destroy the country from within. In this case – our military and law enforcement were acting against us. We pay them loads of money. We cannot let those people stay in our government. They WILL attack us again.
What an HSP needs is self-compassion. It is not only an effective intervention for alleviating mental distress — something we desperately need — but also an effective way to become a better person, and it’s something you yourself can achieve. Self-compassion has three components: self-kindness, common humanity, and mindfulness.
Self-kindness means you’re warm toward yourself when you suffer or mess up, rather than judging yourself harshly (as you are prone to do).
Common humanity means you remind yourself that everyone suffers or messes up sometimes, rather than succumbing to the feeling that you’re the only one going through such hard things.
Mindfulness, here, means you’re neither under- nor overidentified with your painful thoughts — you acknowledge them as painful, but you also recognize that they’re just thoughts, not your whole being.
If I’m judging you properly, you’re already feeling skeptical about all this. Maybe you’re thinking that you need self-criticism to motivate yourself to improve. Maybe you’re worried that self-compassion would breed self-indulgence, leading you to let yourself off the hook too easily.
You needn’t worry about that self-compassion is not only an effective intervention for alleviating mental distress — something we desperately need — but also an effective way to become a better person, and it’s something you yourself can achieve (Note that self-esteem is not the same as self-compassion, since it focuses on validating strengths rather than accepting that we all have weaknesses.).
The self-compassion provides the greatest motivation to improve after an initial failure in something. This motivation for improvement extends to the interpersonal realm, too.
Self-compassionate people are more likely to want to apologize and make amends to others when they mess up. They’re more able to acknowledge when they’ve made a mistake because mistakes don’t feel so psychologically damning. That allows them to take more, not less, responsibility for their actions.
What self-compassion does is actually give you that sense of safety to be able to say, “Okay, I blew it. I feel so bad. Well, it’s human. People make mistakes. How can I repair this?” By contrast, If you feel shame, it shuts down your ability to learn from your mistakes.
Shame is “I am bad.” Guilt is “I did something bad.” Now, what’s really interesting is that while self-compassionate people are less likely to feel shame, they’re more likely to feel guilt. Self-compassionate people endorse harsher moral judgment of themselves and accept their own moral violations less.
The great thing about self-compassion is that it’s a skill anyone can learn. Although it might be harder for some people, like those who’ve experienced the kind of trauma that breeds a harsh inner critic, anyone can practice self-compassion and build it up over time.
Step one is for you to become mindful of what you are feeling in the present moment — simply to be aware that you are in pain. You might say something like, “This is hard. It hurts.” Or, “Wow, there’s a lot of suffering here.”
Step two is to understand that this kind of suffering is part of the human condition. It’s part of our common humanity. You might say something like, “It’s not just me. It’s hard for a lot of people who are traumatized to not shut down emotionally.”
Step three is to offer self-kindness. A good way to start is by shifting basic physiology. As mammals, we’re soothed by physical touch. So you might put your hands over your heart, signaling to your body that it can ease out of a threat state.
You can then begin to ask yourself: “What would I say or do for a friend who was in the same situation? I wouldn’t berate her the way I’m berating myself. I’d probably tell her she’s trying really hard to be the best person she can, and the fact that she’s so distressed shows how deeply she cares about what she is distressing over. Maybe you’d take her out to a nice coffeeshop, where she can have a warm drink and take a few minutes to soothe herself before continuing with her day.” Then she can try saying and doing that for herself.
We call that the compassionate U-turn. If you have trouble offering yourself the full compassion that you’d offer to a friend. Would you be willing to consider treating yourself just a little bit as you might treat a friend?
When you’re resistant to letting go of self-criticism, ask yourself, “What function is this serving me? If I could wave a magic wand and make it so that I could never beat myself up about this again, what would be my greatest fear about that?”
Sometimes, people realize their fear is that they might get lazy or let themselves off the hook too easily, in which case it helps to be reminded that if they keep clinging to self-criticism as a strategy for dealing with their fears. All they have to do is look at themselves in a mirror and truthfully ask themselves. “How’s that working for you?”
If you can acknowledge that your current strategy isn’t helping you overall. From there, you might become more willing to try something new.
If you’re still feeling skeptical — whether because you doubt self-compassion will make you a better person or because you doubt it’s something you can tap into — that’s okay. Rather than trying to force yourself to accept it intellectually, you can adopt the attitude of a scientist running an experiment.
Try some self-compassion in a moment of distress and just see what happens. I’m willing to bet that if you try it, even in small ways, the results will start to convince you it’s a better approach than beating yourself up.
If you’re feeling motivated to learn more, you can let me know here.
Evan, Reading about HSPs, I was going to ask you if I was one. I have heard of this term, and knew a little about HSPs, but never thought I was one until I started reading this blog. Thanks to HSP who initiated this conversation. And to you for your thoughtful post. Yes, I am always motivated to learn more so that I can alleviate some of this overwhelm and distress. I’m tired of beating myself up. It does motivate me to become a better version of myself but it is painful. I am not absent of self-compassion but clearly I can do more in these 3 areas. Thank you.
Which German car brand is the least reliable?
Chris Coleman
Your question is phrased in the present tense, so I’ll omit some previous brands.
Having worked for some German automakers before, including BMW, my personal opinion would be BMW. BMW automobiles have solid build quality, good fit and finish, excellent brakes, suspension and overall performance. However their electronics tend to be troublesome.
BMW tends to build cars that are steeped in “gadgetry,” for lack of a better term. From complex buss systems, iDrive, heads up displays, numerous individual low-voltage modules and sensors everywhere, they will eventually fail and throw codes and warning lights. In most cases, it will only be an ever-present yellow light on the dash, but in worse cases they can place themselves in limp mode, transmissions will not shift, windows will not go down, or they will go down all by themselves in the middle of the night, or any variety of components may suddenly fail to work.
To make matters worse, dealers charge a premium for service on BMW’s.
Do narcissists return after several months of the silent treatment?
N. Riley
Okay, I apparently need to clarify something, since I see these questions a lot:
The silent treatment is not the same as ghosting, cutting contact, or leaving and returning. I say this as someone who has done these many times before, with malicious intent. The silent treatment is when you stop communicating with your partner but continue your relationship. I’m not even sure it can be done in a distance relationship.
If you live together, the silent treatment involves getting up and going about your routine as normal, but simply not speaking to your partner. It’s ignoring them to their face. This is much worse than taking some space or rearranging your schedule so you don’t see them. They may yell and beg and even threaten you out of desperation to get some, any response. It’s extremely dehumanizing and demeaning. It’s kinda like the “I’m not mad, you’re the one yelling” game where you keep calm deliberately to trigger their anger. People will break down over the silent treatment. It’s amazing.
Because of how it works, you can only really do silent treatment when you like live, work, or go to school with someone. You need to be obligated to be around them. I can understand using this term for cutting off contact for a short period as long as you make it clear the relationship is not over, but I don’t use the term this way.
Cutting contact without saying anything and not responding to someone is ghosting. It can be a temporary thing or it can be permanent. It’s a way to avoid confrontation and drama from breaking up. It also keeps you from having to definitively say it’s over, so it can be useful if you’re not sure you’ll be back. It’s rude and doesn’t give closure, so it can cause social backlash.
So, I am guessing that this question is asking about ghosting, not silent treatment. It’s possible that your narc will return, but after several months, I would say it’s not likely. I have ghosted people for a few weeks to a month and returned, but never longer than that. Once you start getting up into the 6+ month range, it’s over. Not that they for sure won’t come back, but the odds are so low you need to move on with your life. There’s always a slight chance we’ll come back when whatever other relationships we’re in don’t work out.
What happens if you eat too much shrimp?
Lucia Garcia
Shrimp is a typical high protein, low fat, low calorie food. 100 grams of shrimp contains 20 grams of protein and almost zero fat content.
Shrimp is one of the foods with the highest protein content, and its protein content is several times or even ten times that of fish, eggs and milk.
Generally speaking, shrimp are quite safe. Eating shrimp can not only avoid gaining weight, but also supplement nutrition and enhance physical fitness.
The side effects of shrimp are mainly due to its High Cholesterol and High Purines.
According to the USDA, 100 grams of shrimp contains 187 milligrams of cholesterol. Excessive cholesterol can lead to the accumulation of plaque in the arteries, causing various cardiovascular and cerebrovascular problems.
The purine content of 100g of shrimp is about 270 mg. Excessive consumption of high-purine foods can significantly increase the uric acid index in the body’s blood, which raises the risk of gout.
Therefore, it is recommended to consume no more than 100 grams of shrimp per day
We have existed in this domain for more than 400 years as Greenland sharks. The humans know that we can live from 250 to 500 years. They for the most part leave us alone. Of course that could be because we weight more than a ton and we are aggressive when approached.
Our concern is that we will be able to survive a nuclear war with humans, but suffer from eating their radioactive corpses. No need to be sarcastic. We have come to love the sea and would like to ask if you can spare large portions of it in the Artic? We have decided to venture out to discover what we have been putting off for centuries. What we have found we like.
Ayahuasca tea has been approved to be brought up, but other combinations have been forbidden for human consumption while said humans are aboard hovercrafts or similar travel modii.
How To Get Your Cell Phone Returned if You lose it.
If someone else finds your lost phone, and it’s locked — the way it oughta be — that person has no way to know whose phone it is. Consequently, they’ve got no way to get in touch with you and return the phone, even if they might be a decent human who’s inclined to try.
➜ So take those 22 seconds now and set your mushy-brained, future-phone-losing self up for success:
Head into your phone’s system settings.
Tap “Display” followed by “Lock screen” — or, on a device made by Samsung, tap “Lock screen” in the main menu of options.
Look for the line labeled “Add text on lock screen” and tap it. On a Samsung phone, look for “Contact information” instead.
Type in some easy instructions for anyone who finds the phone to reach you. You might ask ’em to call or text the phone number of a friend or family member, for instance, to email you, or anything else that’d allow them to get in touch with a minimal amount of effort.
Make sure to save your message, and that’s it: From that point forward, those instructions will always appear on your lock screen in plain sight for anyone who happens to stumble onto your phone in the real world.
Will someone explain “Rent Free” to me.
Living Inside the Mind
Rent free is one of the most interesting online slang terms to emerge in the last few years. It means “living inside someone’s head” and is commonly used to insult someone who seems obsessed to an unhealthy degree. Alternatively, some people view it as a way to deflect criticism on the internet.
This slang term is a spin on the standard definition of the phrase. According to the Oxford Dictionary, rent-free is means “not paying or requiring rent.” So, for example, if a friend lets you sleep on their couch for a day, you’d call your accommodation rent-free. One thing to note is that the common word is usually spelled with a dash or “rent-free,” while the slang term is generally spelled without the hyphen or “rent free.”
An essential part of the analogy is that the person you’re thinking about should not be thinking about you. This could be because they’re famous, so they have no idea who you are. It might also be because they bother you significantly more than you bother them, so there’s no reason for them to pay you any mind. That’s why they’re living there “rent free,” — because they don’t have to “pay” attention to you, yet they still stay inside your mind.
The Origin of Rent Free
The idea of “rent free” referring to someone living in your mind predates the internet. The phrase is attributed to Eppie Lederer, who wrote: “Hanging onto resentment is letting someone you despise live rent-free in your head.” Since then, rent free was used infrequently in literature and media until it took off on the internet.
Who posted this?
What women need to know:
> A man will marry the best looking woman he can afford because a man is always looking for the best looking woman.
A woman will marry the richest guy she can attract, if she’s marrying for money.
>Men use power and money for sex.
Women use sex for power and money, if she is not looking for emotional security.
>Men prefer the company of other men in their same income tax bracket.
Women prefer the company of other women with their same emotional and/or intellectual state of being.
=Show me the hottest woman in the world and I’ll show you a dude who’s tired of doing her because he can’t make an emotional commitment.
Show me the richest man and I’ll show you a woman who is tired of doing him because he doesn’t respect her in or out of bed.
>Most men would rather have three 7s for a weekend than one 10; variety trumps quality for men because most fine it difficult to show emotional loyalty.
>Most men would rather do it three times, once with each of three different women, than nine times with the same woman.
*A woman can marry more money in ten minutes than she can make in a lifetime because men insure that she doesn’t get the same economic opportunities.
>Men have no trouble thinking about someone else while having sex.
>Most straight men who won’t admit to desiring his neighbor’s attractive wife is either lying or lying.
Most straight women who won’t admit to desiring her neighbor’s attractive husband because she would never act upon it, and her husband would never forgive the desire.
*Good looking women are a dime a dozen.
Really rich men are a bit more rare, hence they have the advantage in this equation. But that is no reason for a woman not to bargain wisely.
*If women better understood men, they wouldn’t be so depressed when their relationships go bad. And maybe, just maybe they’d choose more carefully, or leave a bad one sooner.
Putin just ordered his best general, Alexander Dvornikov, to Ukraine.
Alexander Dvornikov
The unofficial title this Dvornikov guy has is “Butcher of Syria”. This was the guy that led mass bombardment of Syrian cities until they were ready to surrender. Under his command, dozens of chemical weapons attacks were launched at various targets in Syria, many of them of little military value. He targeted bread lines, civilian evacuation areas, child daycare centers and more, until the Syrian rebels threw in the towel.
This is like giving the command to Oskar Dirlewanger and expressing hope the Einsatzgruppen will behave from now on.
Russian government should be forced to suffer for its invasion of Ukraine. Unfortunately they are unlikely to do so. So we’re forced to dissuade them by making it practically impossible for the Russian Federation to increase it’s aggression in Europe.
The US is using this war to try out so many experimental war options that the greedy military industrial complex is faking some of the data on their expensive options to get the US to buy them and try them in the field. As always the rich will find a way to steal tax payers dollars.
Speaking of getting ripped off. Someone buys me a different kind of Ferrari. Every year after that I have to turn it in for the annual tune up. That cost 13 000 Euro. Just for the checking and lubing. If anything needs replacing it will be on top of that. These are shit cars to drive because they are just not qualified to drive todays fucked up streets. The only plus I can see is that after holding them for a few years, there is always some fool willing to pay way more than they paid for the car to get it.
July marked the first month that more than 1 million courses of Pfizer’s COVID antiviral Paxlovid were prescribed, according to Biden administration figures provided to Axios.
The big picture: There were 1.26 million courses dispensed last month, a 37% increase over June. Additionally, more Paxlovid was dispensed in the month of July than that prescribed from January through May combined, per the Department of Health and Human Services.
More than one third of all reported coronavirus cases in July were treated with Paxlovid, which represents the highest percentage of cases yet treated with the drug.
You were told NOT to approach the White House with an intent to expose that you were aliens here to prevent a nuclear disaster. That violated ˇÓ´ ´Â∏´Ø‰Ø’s Edict.
That is the reason your agents were hit. You need to remove them from that earth hospital care before they are discovered as non humans. We can assist.